Why was I offline for so long?
These dates make me remember an experience that I will never forget, in March 2023 I made the decision to make a radical change in my life, I felt saturated, meaningless and I felt that my soul needed to explore different places, so I sold the things I had and bought a ticket to Spain, in my plans I thought that my life would change and in fact it did, but nothing turned out as I thought... I had a cousin in Marbella who welcomed me, Her husband had a hotel (he was Spanish) and I started working there in the maintenance part, everything was new for me, the weather, the country, the people, but I thought I just had to adapt and I would feel better. I was living right there in the hotel and working hard at the same time, it was a radical change in my life after having been a f4f model for 5 years and having the lifestyle that a webcam model has. When 1 month passed, I asked my cousin's husband about the payment and he told me that it was enough to let me live in the hotel and give me food and that he was not going to give me any money, so all my work was worthless and I had to leave there without knowing what I was going to do. I had a friend in Madrid, so I took my suitcases and went there, he let me stay at his house and did not charge me for the first month, I was looking for work everywhere, walking without knowing the city, with extreme climates that I had never experienced and only using Google maps to not get lost, everything was totally new for me and the uncertainty grew more and more, I no longer had money to survive and nor to return to Colombia at that time, so I searched the street I met a person who recommended me to someone who made Colombian empanadas, he sold them wholesale so that I could sell them on the street as a street vendor, so I decided to start selling Colombian empanadas on the street, at first it was frustrating because I didn't know the city, there was a lot of discrimination against Latinos from Europeans and the climates were very difficult, when it was summer, the heat sometimes reached up to 40 degrees, and when it was winter the weather dropped to less than 0 degrees, but I didn't have documents, so this job gave me a little more than what I could earn "black" in another job like construction or something like that, the problem was that in Spain street sales are totally prohibited, so I had to run when I saw the police because they would take the merchandise and also give me a fine, just as it happened to me many times. times when they caught me selling somewhere, I had more than 15 fines and many times they took away my merchandise and I had to start again the next day, it was frustrating but it was the only way to survive that I found at that time and within me was the hope that things would improve at some point, so 3 years passed until I got tired and decided to return to my country, it was an experience that marked my life because I learned to value many things that Before, I didn't give them importance, like time in person with my family, being able to hug them, share a conversation with them looking into their eyes and not through a screen, the food from my country, the treatment of people on the street without them discriminating against you just for being from another country, enjoying your work and not doing it just to survive, being able to enjoy a good climate and being able to go out in the street with the clothes you want to wear that day, but above all, feeling good about yourself every day and being able to enjoy your life... So I think it was a unique experience that I needed to live to learn many things and be able to return to my land with another mentality and here I am enjoying again to return to this place that made me happy for so many years, but that I had to leave for a while to be able to appreciate it...