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Female Performer Chat: The Thread of Good Times

Created by: davidzzzzzz

12/23/18 @ 10:28am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Washington, DC
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Created by: dudley_do_ride

12/24/18 @ 1:31pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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Yeah, if you are stuck in an asylum and someone is bothering you with a lot of fool questions it is important to be able to harness your hallucinations for some relief.

Right now I am hallucinating a cockney doing the Lannester song:

Ooooowwwww ooooo are yew me laird ee saydh
Thaht eye mus bow sa loo
Owwwwwww only aye cat wit' a diffraint cawht
Ees awl the traith eye trow
Ain een a cawt awf blu aor raid
Aye wayeyair steel gots claws
Owwwwayn myn are lawn aynd shahp me laird
Ays lawn ayn shahp ays yairs.

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Created by: davidzzzzzz

12/28/18 @ 7:08am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 13,827

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Sharp claws and skinny jeans,
Beware the Werewolf Stripper!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

1/18/19 @ 10:43pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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You know your stuff is good stuff if that same stuff you made for a funeral is played at all occasions, and everyone goes quiet to get every note. Even that stoned drummer from the metal band.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

1/21/19 @ 10:13am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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Finally! It is nearly done. The libretto. Of my MasterWerk!

Oh it is so hard to create the perfect work! You cannot trust a word or note to anyone else. No matter your wealth or power, you cannot buy or force beauty into your creation. Patronage is doomed to failure. The Medici were shams.

But drop by drop my bl00d has poured into the work. It nearly lives. It is about to rise up out of the primordial substrate! To stagger about on unchained limbs groaning its first reaction to the cold, dark world! To grab the ingnorant critic by the throat and shake in fury!!! To silence the presumptuous audience before it can rise to its feet and applaud!

The New Age has nearly spawned! Mankind is about to take its next halting step up the never ending ladder!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

3/12/19 @ 5:08am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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But first... a thought provoking reminder of man's treachery to man:

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

4/1/19 @ 10:43pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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To say that one has lost the thread means one thing and then another in this or that context. When I grip a packet of fast food salsa by the corner and fail to open it... even after taking care to have clean fingers... my breakfast burrito may look at me accusingly.

But do I care?

Have I not lived in this world and survived all of my species' machinations? Have I not played the game?

Love is not something I will know more of. That I have resigned myself to. I ready myself for the mantle of the eccentric.

But confine me not in the narrow circumspecting regard of your boinging eyes! I will be free! My lusts will be lusted! My dreams will come true!

Though all becomes slowly bland and gray. Though my eyes may no longer reach the horizon as I shamble along. I will never submit!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

4/10/19 @ 10:25am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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You have climbed all the way from the base of this mountain to ask me about life's meaning? In your gortex unisuit or whatever you call it these days.

I have been sitting here with my wizened shanks stuck to this fucking glacier for centuries. Subsisting on fucking ice crystals. Ice crystals! And you want me to spout Philosophy? Philosophy!?!

You left your house in the burbs on cheap airline 'cause your life seems a little empty. You lugged up lots of gear on your grand crusade. Including a thermos of coffee. Coffee! Do you know what the smell of that is doing to my desperately deprived nostrils!? Do you realize that being in a thermos somehow magnifies the wonder of that smell to me one millionfold?

The Meaning of Life is grow up you fucking reprobate! The only reason I waste my words on you is that it warms me up. I might be able to detach my gray fanny from this ice floe.

Make up some crazy story to please your idiot friends. Tell them you met a whole pantheon of gods up here and they all told you just how special you are. That you are now so incredibly centered and now have the perfect diet to keep your tummy slim. Fritter away the few days until your ultimate doom and dirt nap on the same idle pursuits that have occupied your vacuous whatever you call is on your neck and leave me your thermos for having to deal with you at, what is it? At 5 fucking am on a fucking Sunday.

Of all the mountains in the world I had to pick one near the ramp of the dipshit dock.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/10/19 @ 7:53pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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Who... who knows the hearts of men? I pity those of you who think they are simple, silly creatures. Pity.

Read History and be warned. Ponder the core of literature and be warned. Warned.

To say we are merely fickle is to be naive. You should feel as you did when the raptor turned the door handle.

Our upward progress is seen when we stand back and view matters from a distance. It will tempt you to give the mean to the individual realizations.
But your experience will not be with the mean. Your experience will not be the overall sum of the biographer. It may be the outlier. The contingency.

'Ware then the pull of the Age. Look wisely how you step. Take no charity from kind advice but view it only as the courtesy of a foe seeking honor.

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Created by: kertzum

5/13/19 @ 12:39am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: Oz
Posts: 151

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/14/19 @ 12:09am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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... we have no foes Duds only ...well only ... ummmm

Yeah I know what you mean. It has taken a lot of fun out of Life. There you are walking down the alley, on the way to your mistress, and you are jumped by your arch rival. He sends his blade whooshing toward your chest and you deftly deflect it to one side with your traveling sword. You make some comment about his botching of the ambush and he curses and disappears in a puff of craftiness. Your mistress coos and pampers you for where his treacherous blade nicked you and made you late to her loving arms.

*sigh* I dealt with my last rival years ago. A terrible evil cat that was the death of my marriage. Who slashed hapless super bowl party goers' ankles with devious claws. Whose very destruction was my undoing and the start of this terrible, bland phase of existence with no challenger. My skills have slacked. My step is no longer so gallant. All I do is brood now and think of my past battles with that sinewy creature from the black depths of hell.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/17/19 @ 10:07am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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My first encounter with that furred villain was deep in the Kush. I was point for Banzai doing penetrate, subvert and extract. Buckaru was MIA and we needed recon fast.

I was prowling the opium dens looking for leads, shaking out information. That's where I first saw that monster. Flat on his back indulging his feral needs. Surrounded by minions and stoned groupies.

I could see right away he was evil because he was so well fed. So well groomed. In a part of the world where everyone else was ratty and starving. I knew he was feeding off of them all. He was a great big furry leach with his claws stuck in deep to the tit that he was sucking.

I have a license to dispatch evil the moment I see it. I did not hesitate. But it is true what they say about their nine lives. I would deal with this fiend over and over and over again in all his incarnations.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/19/19 @ 1:06pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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Oh what a divine gift is the gift of speech. The gods have bestowed it upon only one of the millions of species.

Surely my hairy rival could have done much greater evil if he could articulate while he manipulated. The gods may smite us with evil but they give that evil limitations that can give us that opening we desperately need to overcome with enough sacrifice and determination. In all his feline forms he was as mute as a post. He was able to sway and enslave large numbers of followers all the same. But he could never rise to hold ultimate power.

He was able to control wealth. Imagine that. Able only to purr, yowl, and mew , he was gifted enough as a villain to nevertheless move vast sums of money to different types of accounts. His foul spirit inhabited a form that interacted with humans only at the best of times as a pet. Yet despite the social inequality, the steeply unlevel playing field, he perpetually got his way. It was kind of inspiring in a dark, horrible way.

The Enlightened have an instinct for knowing the nature of the incarnations they meet. I had no illusions about having defeated him after that 1st encounter. I did not rest easy at all even though evil had confined such a demon within this suboptimal frame. His genius shone even in his humble plans for limited domination. In fact the humble nature of his plans impressed me more than anything. We often rely upon evil to overstep its ability through its arrogance. We forget that a more humble evil often quietly succeeds unnoticed and often unopposed.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/22/19 @ 4:13am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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The fell beast knew he had nine lives. Knew he could experiment and take risks. He made the best of that chance.

Though I sent his soul back to his maker time and time again, each time it was at greater cost. It became a study in applied evil.

Though he kept his humble genius throughout, his arrogance manifested in his use of the same form each time. He clearly demanded of his maker that he not just be a cat but that he be the same cat. Same breed. Black. Short haired. Green eyes. He saw to it in his grooming and life choices that he was sleek, well fed, quick on his feet. Possessing all the grace, speed, and hunting ability of the best of his breed. He loved to be recognized with one look of his devious eyes. Recognized by me while all the world thought he was an innocent puss.

By the time he reached life number nine he was a master of the game. Knowing my strengths and limitations, knowing the weaknesses of human society. When we war overmuch with one foe he knows us.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/22/19 @ 6:52am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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The padded paw of Fate is on my neck! Green eyes bedevil me in the night! My conscience scratches at me trying to make me feel some regret for Justice done. But my cold reptilian heart hisses at it and says "Begone"

He took part of me to his final grave. I am not whole. This is the price we must pay for unknown sins. Somehow our failings let evil gain purchase in this existence.

But those of you who struggle with whether is better to fight or bow to it, let me tell you how sweet it is to have triumphed. How well compensated I am for the pain. Once a man has entered that battle and survived, he gains for the rest of his life a confidence and freedom that let him live like never before. He knows that one part of this existence is incorruptible. He has made one part of the universe secure. Howl then all ye devils and have at me! I cannot lose!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/24/19 @ 8:16pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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I have often been asked whether the beast had the soul of a Lannister or that of a Stark. I cannot account for the source of inspiration for such odd questions. But in the interest of completeness I will venture an answer.
Oh he had the cunning of a Tywin to be be sure. The ruthlessness yes. But no concept of family or legacy. A definate loner with no interest in the good of any other entity.
He possessed their greed and their great wealth. But no vaulting ambition to possess any throne.
Did he share anything in common with the Starks? No. I would have enjoyed throwing him a red wedding or three but he wouldn't fall for it. He surely had no concept of duty nor honor. In a fight you could be sure he'd use all the dirtiest tricks. If you dropped your sword while dueling him you'd better run fast or be split from stem to stern.
He didn't have the discipline to be a truly great assassin. Oh yeah he was trained in several martial arts but he just didn't have any thirst to perfect anything. Anything that smacked of virtue he would avoid like the very plague.
So no. There is nothing in his story that is complex, interesting or compelling. Nothing to launch a new series over. He'd be right out of place in any scene with dragons.
But thanks for asking!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

5/30/19 @ 9:32am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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A man can do worse than seeking to realize the Musketeer Trinity. Oh he should have the fashion sense and good spirits of a Porthos. The seriousness and thoughtfulness of an Aramis. The brooding cleverness and sense of an Athos. Oh and I suppose we can bring a fourth pillar to the support... the courage if not recklessness of a D'Artagnon.

But is that all? What of the careful planning ability and team building skills of a Richelieu? The flirtability and sophistication of a Lady D'Winter? Should they be considered true pure villains? Is there no virtue hiding within their devious forms that could not be upheld and taken to heart? Didn't France fare better than Spain because of the positive aspects of the cardinal's diplomacy?

One hopes that the reader is able to move beyond simple models and into something that is a better approximation to reality. Were not the musketeers reckless to the cause of the nation? Emphasizing romance and gallantry to the point they would sometimes help the nation's enemies in the very actions that were detrimental to their own national interest? Complexity is a real thing. You can be sure that a skilled villain will use it to camoflage his worst transgressions.

Our cat was no simple idealist when it came to working evil. He did not have a naive view of this world. Oh how dangerous it would have been to underestimate him. But even knowing this, feeling it in the gut, is something his quick mind accounted for. For he knew that the hero may know but the masses do not. If he must fall he can have the masses make the hero fall harder.

The ignorance of the masses is something the worker of public weal cannot tolerate. He must continually strive to pit them against their vices or let good men fall.

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

6/2/19 @ 8:09pm (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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I have known... I have always known... that my work is a danger to my family. That life is a fragile thing. We have to enjoy it immensely and immediately because it can vanish or change character in a flash.

We cannot sacrifice Virtue for longer life for our friends or ourselves and reach the Enlightened Ideal. To be Incorruptible in the face of evil, to follow the Way, we cannot cling to any comfort, any possession, any source of joy. Because there is a kind of evil out there, looking for its chance, that will hold the Good to this test. It is the primary arrow in its quiver. It loves to find that crack in the armor and make Virtue heel to any other thing. It doesn't matter what.
To defeat Death we merely need to accept it without fear. To achieve power and peace we only need to cast away conditions and a shallow happiness and promote Virtue to the fore. Not the empty virtue, the sham virtue, that is the counterfeit created by manipulative men. But the true, honest core that is built upon love of living creatures and seeking their well-being.

We have to measure our success not by how much we acquire, not by how popular we are, but by the quality of the decisions we have made. To follow the Way. The Way is not easy. It is not for everyone. But everyone should strive to be moving in that direction, helping others to stay as close as they can to this hard, narrow path. It requires sharp eyes and iron gut to view reality as it is and see the right path. It requires good fortune and good genes to win victories with the meager chances offered along that road. But we all know when we are far from it. We know when we are working against it deliberately. When we align with darkness and destruction. When we surrender. Or when the pain is too much.

My furry enemy was not an opposite to myself. No mirror image from another universe. He was a physical incarnation from the nether darkness bent upon the ruin of my particular stream of work. It is an honor to have such opposition. That Hell itself constructs a counter for you because Life has failed to crush the will to labor on the Way. Glory then at your own personal villain sculpted by demons for your personal destruction. It shows that you are shaking the pillars of creation!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

6/6/19 @ 1:03am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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It was then that I took my vow of celibacy... It was only through denial that I could achieve everything. Through the potash of the campfire glaze I rode the 300 as the buckskin dragged on washboard flats.

Aye gunslinger. Fight those lobstrosities while the world remain unmoved on.

The crooked crannies twisted up to the shrieking aeries and so did I. But without the gleam of bling in my teeth. For my legs must be strong and my spirit unstaked when I move across the wastelands pursuing nemesis. Neeeeeeyemeeeesis. I howl in the shrieking dustbowl daring you to stand and fight. Neeeeeeeyemmmmysis!!!!!!!!!!! I have gone to that place where you cannot win!

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Created by: dudley_do_ride

6/6/19 @ 8:04am (EDT) | UTC - 4:00
Location: hain't Pochipsie son
Posts: 3,294

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Dawn... slant-rayed cold dawn. All shut out but beckoning beams that I roll along in my hunt. I know the path to my enemy. I always do. He can only flee and strew traps along the route. His lives decrement steadily. His final incarnation is near. Though the cost rises and rises staggering my personal economy... I will not bend nor slow. His destruction is an inevitable as the final end of all things. The only question is the contingent series of universe shaking events that must be traversed. No waggle of hips, no brush of lips, no feast nor famine, no piteous call for help.. nothing will stop me from my obsessed hell-chasing path.

I have seen the evil he can work in a minute of unharried time. I will hound him. I will make his cold paws fumble with his next trap setting. He will hear me coming closer, ever closer. He has no time to train. No hone more his insufficient skills. He can only keep a little bit ahead as the chase distance closes and closes. A Mountie may be many things but he is always one thing when he is on your tail. There is nowhere in existence you can hide.

So 'ware evil doers. Justice will come for you relentlessly, inevitably, coldly.

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